All it takes is a little convincing.

We got back to the city. Thank god. It took all of my dinner last night to convince them to let us come here. But once we established that the city is only 40 minutes away, not 3 hours, and we have a ton of stuff to do here, it worked. I don't know what I'm more excited about, internet or mcdonalds. and getting more quai on my phone so i can actually keep using it.

A lot has happened since saturday. We went on a hike to a temple on a mountain. Which was really not worth it. and i made the trek in my rainbows. which warranted the chinese partners telling me to be careful 100 times. It took all my energy not to snap at them. I don't know why they think they are in charge of us and know more than us, but they do. I sort of want to stand up and be like hey, i've probably done a lot more, been a lot more places, and seen a lot more than all of you. i know when to be careful. and that does not include every 5 steps of hiking or avoiding a certain path because there is a dog. I am 21 and can take care of myself, thanks.

We also moved houses. Which sucked because i loved our host family, but now we have a real shower and a bed(even if i am sharing it). and there's a possibility of getting internet in the house, but this is china, and who knows.

i miss home. and having people to talk to. The other 2 girls in the village are good to have, but I just don't connect with them. everyone on this program seems to be from such a different background than me. I mean, I know when I'm travelling to only bring bags i can carry, not to have to rely on someone else everytime. and i'm okay with being dirty, i don't need massages or pedicures. I just am sort of at this roadblock with the other people here, I want to yell at them sometimes to step outside of their bubble, but i also know to keep it civil because these are the few people i will have to talk to for the next few weeks. It'll just be good to be back to my real life, I'm ready to start counting down the days.

Why do I keep doing this?

And I survived my first week of life in rural China. There has been lots of complaining, but it reality, it has not been that bad. There have been moments, but there always are. It's so funny, everytime I have done something like this, giving up my luxuries to go live in the middle of nowhere, I am always pleasently surprised by the living situations. In Belize it was my bed and breakfast hut that I adored, and then Guatemala with our brand new house. Now here, I have a shower, kind of, the house is 2 stories, and the family is so sweet. Of course there's not AC or internet, but I am managing. We bought fans to survive the heat, it seems almost worst than Thailand. At least in Thailand we had AC to escape to, but fans are cutting it for now. That isn't to say I haven't felt sweaty and gross since the second I got here, but I guess that is to be expected.
Teaching is going well. The kids are much easier to deal with than expected. I have the youngest class, 1-3 grade. I wanted them though. Until I realized have kids that speak no english and a teacher who speaks no chinese is not the best combonation. I am completley reliant on my teaching partner in the classes. Too bad we don't get along so well. The situation is improving I hope, after I almost yelled at her in the middle of class.
The hardest thing here has been the partners. They are just so concerned and worried for us being uncomfortable that they almost take it a step too far. I feel like I am 5. They always have to take us places, then tell us what to do, when to do things, how to do things. I think I scare the hell out of them because I got sick the first day and keeping sitting in "dirt". they don't realize I will never be completely clean or healthy in this situation, it just comes with the territory.

Well we are in the "city" for the day to get internet and some ac. i was hoping for western food as well, but that doesn't look like it will happen. The definition of city is not as I would have expected. This is about to cut out any second so I will end. I doubt I will blog again before this is over, internet is just so rare.

Why?

I've been thinking about this the past few days, and why am I china? I just feel so overwhelmed here. The majority of the group speaks Chinese or has some interest in the area. Me? I'm just along for the ride it seems. And the ride hasn't been that amazing so far. We'll see how it goes once in the villages. For now though, I'm struggling. I feel like I can't go anywhere on my own, I can't speak the language, I don't have a map, I don't know where anything is. I've never been in this position before, and it is not easy.

We leave for our villages Saturday. Internet is going to be rare they said, so updates might not happen. I don't know, lets just hope I stay alive out here. This sure is one of the biggest adventures yet.

I really am a technology addict.

I miss my computer. It makes it much harder to blog and email and view pictures and just keep track of life in general without it. I know I will live, I've done this last summer and such, but man it sucks some days. For now its hostel internet, which grated is decent in the moment, but in chiang mai made me want to throw computers out the window.

Chiang Mai in general was awesome. It was my week to be a complete tourist, and well sometimes I just need that. Going elephant trekking, white water rafting, shopping tours, it was fun. Much better than Bangkok with classes and then trying to find something to do for an afternoon. And in Chiang Mai there was just so much. I feel I could have stayed another week, but its probably better I didn't. I'm still dissapointed we didn't get to go the beach again, my tan is completely gone, but I guess if I ever return here, then I can. But as of late, it looks like Asia might be checked off the list and it will be several years before I am back. I don't know, this just has been the most frustrating trip I've had to date. Part of it is the people, the language, the crappy food, just everything. I want to go home. More like I want to yell at some thais and then head home to a non-rock bed and some food that I know what I'm eating. But nope, today we head off to China. Lord knows what this adventure will bring. Please most likely expect me to jump a flight home within a week. As for now though, I will update this when I can, but I really have no idea what to expect in terms of communication while I'm in this village bathing in a river. Oh boy, the stuff I sign up for.

It's good to see nature again.

So I am out of VP tower and Bangkok in general. I was really sad to move out, I got use to having a "home" over here, and now that is gone. Now its for hostels until I get a family in China.

I spent Monday, getting up early and moving out of VP, then did some mall adventures. Mostly to buy a new suitcase since I have way too much crap, and to get in some AC. The silly hostel in Bangkok only turns on the AC at night, which made it unbearable to be in there during the day. So Paragon it was. I think overall though, I wasn't use to all this activity and being outside in the city, I got really dehydrated. I felt like crap Monday, and then again on Tuesday. Tuesday was spent seeing the big sights in Bangkok again since one of the girls from the LE program met up with me to travel, and had never seen Bangkok. It was good to see the grand Palace and such again one last time, it reminded me of the parts of Bangkok I loved. But everything I kept comparing over to Rang Nam, I never knew I enjoyed that so much.


Wednesday, or yesterday I guess, we left for Chiang Mai. Chiang Mai is so drastically different from Bangkok. It seems a million times smaller, and is still the second largest city in the country. There's canals and greenery everywhere. The streets are lined with shops and restaurants. This is tourist friendly city, you can walk around much easier than in Bangkok. We took a taxi ride out to a tiger place for lunch yesterday, you get to eat lunch watching tigers play and then can pay to go play with the cubs. We did, of course. The cubs really just wanted to sleep, until he decided purses made good toys. It was fun, I don't think I will ever get tired of seeing tigers. At night we went out to a Khantoke show, which was traditional thai food and dance. It was good to see that aspect of the culture.

Today we went on a "safari". In the pouring rain. So we rode elephants, rode an ox cart, saw an elephant show, rode bamboo rafts and then went to an orchid farm. I really had a good day, it was much better than my previous 30 minute elephant encounter. And the bus ride wasnt all that long, which is always a plus. Now I'm exhausted though. Time for a nap, dinner and then I think we are going to go to the Muay Thai show tonight.

I wish I had a soundtrack to my life.

I mean seriously, the songs just of this past month make me question things. Like hearing George Michael while riding a bus around Singapore. Or that bus trip and its soundtrack on the way to Hua Hin( We swear it was the top love songs of the 80s, followed by a Thai Cd which we quickly learned the words to). Then coming back from the airport today it was oldies, mainly Elvis. And the L, is for the way you look.... song.

Anyways, I went to Singapore for the weekend. Well just 24 hours. And that was enough. I didn't know what to do with myself there. I got there and was quickly overwhelmed. First I couldn't find the hostel, then I couldn't stay at the hostel since they were cleaning, so I chose a random place in my book to go, and left my book at the hostel. So yeah, after spending 30 mins finding the metro, I got to my stop, and realized I didn't know what I was looking for. It was about this point that I realized I was in a country all by myself. I've gone places by myself, like going to Krabi. But my cell phone didn't work in Singapore, and I knew no one. Yeah people knew I was there, but its a big place. No one knew my hostel, flight times, anything. I started to freak, but then realized it was okay. And that somewhere in these past 3 years, I really have gotten courage. All this traveling by myself, going off to half way around the world. I never imagined this would be my life.


Eventually after my freak out I had a delicious lunch in one of the many malls. And I used chopsticks, which I really need to work on. I have to say though, as much as I didn't really enjoy Singapore, the food there was delicious. For dinner I had turkish food, so falafel and this bread/spinach/cheese thing. I was in heaven. I miss having good food. I really think after this summer I will never want to see rice or noodles again. Or at least for a few weeks.

My trip to singapore was spent the majority on a bus. Like those big red opentop city tour buses everywhere else in the world. The bus just came along and I had no idea where I was, so I jumped on. It seemed like a good idea. I really got to see the majority of the city and it was cool. And there was no more getting lost or mass transit issues. So I was happy.

My one goal in going to Singapore was that I had wanted to go on the night safari. Well it was full at my hostel. And by the time I paid for this bus tour, I didn't want to spend another 40 bucks to go the zoo. So I did one of the night tours through the bus company. We went to go see the biggest show in Singapore. OH wow. Basically, it was a bunch of kids lipsyncing and being overdramatic, like seriously over dramatic with the hands and such. It felt like the Indiana Jones show at Disney world, mixed with a fountain show, and then 10 times worst. All the Asians were clapping and taking pictures, I was not that impressed. It was hilarious though in some way. And I guess it was better than spending the night in the hostel, where I found it impossible to sleep.

Anyways, tonight is my last night in VP tower. I'm actually sort of sad. It's weird with everyone being gone, I don't know what to do. So I did laundry and now am waiting to pack. I hate packing. But it is nessecary. I hate to say it, but I might have changed my mind, I think I might just miss this city. All yesterday I just wanted to go home, home as in VP tower.

Part 1: Completed

And my Thai field school is done with. It's a huge sigh of relief. Granted I still have some assignments to do for it, but this whole month in Bangkok, this group, it's done. I feel like I haven't learned much while being here. I also feel at the same time I really haven't made any connections with this group. It was a great experience, and as always, I never have regrets, I just don't know. It could have been a lot better, let's say that. It's over though, so yay.

The last few days here were pretty blah. Wednesday and Thursday I really only left the room to go eat. Today we had a final group meeting, then I went on some adventure to the mall, and then a group dinner. Oh, and I decided to cut my hair. Yep, went to the mall, bought scissors, and cut it. I think it turned out pretty good, considering I've never done this before. We shall see my opinion in a few days on that matter though.

Tomorrow it is up bright and early to Singapore. Just a 24 hour trip, basically a visa run. I hope I get to see the city, I'm afraid I might be too tired or overwhelmed going there all on my own. It as always, will be an experience.